I wake up in the morning. “Excuse me sir, thank you for checking the news on your phone, would you like to play some Genshin Impact?” The fuck is that? No. I go to YouTube. “Excuse me sir, here’s a guide on how to level up fast in Genshin Impact” Uh thanks, but I didn’t ask. I’m trying to watch anime openings right now. I go to Doujins. I fap. I come back to YouTube “Excuse me sir, would you like some Genshin Impact fap material for your next masturbation?” NO GOD DAMMIT! What the fuck is it, what the fuck is it, what the fuck is this shit they’re shoving down my throat at every possible turn!?!

If you’re like me, you haven’t been able to escape the Genshin Impact craze that has swept the Internet by storm recently. At first it was like, one or two videos being shown in my recommendations. Now it’s like everywhere you go you’re gonna get somebody yelling about how they spent hundreds of dollars on Genshin Impact. And no, that was not a haha Snooze joke, I’ve already watched a few of those videos to see if they made me feel poor. They did. So today, I fucking gave up and learned about Genshin Impact. Apparently it’s a new action role-playing game from the people who made Honkai 3rd Impact. It’s a relatively new concept in which gacha mechanics are combined with an open fantasy world that many have compared to a Breath of the Wild vibe. A big reason that it’s blown up so hard is that it is available on Windows, PS4, Android, IOS, and it’s slated to eventually be on the Switch according to Wikipedia. With the price tag of free, everyone and their mother hopped on the bandwagon fast as hell considering it came out on September 28th. Here’s the launch trailer in case you’re interested.

After reviewing some footage, I tell you what if I wasn’t short on time I’d be fucking tempted. The graphics look hella clean but more importantly, the premise of having different characters and switching between them to fit the needs of your team/to be effective against certain enemy types does appear to be a fun time. What I’m really excited for though, is the lewds. 2020 has been a crazy year for gaming trends. For a while Fortnite and PUBG were like, THE “trendy” games that everyone was playing. Then that died down and it was quiet for a bit. Fall Guys emerged like a phoenix and dominated online content for a while. Then Among Us rose up and took the most popular spot. Now, Genshin Impact is making similar kinds of massive waves. It’s crazy that games have been able to rise and fall to such immense levels of popularity this year and I wonder if quarantine has aided with that. Regardless, we all know what happens when things get popular. They get lewded (I mean, just peep the cover picture for this article). In fact I surmise some more lewd news will be coming out surrounding this game before next week. 

I'm liking this waifu to husbando ratio though.

At least anime is getting some good ass representation. Lord, take away my temptations to play this game. I’m a good, productive little boy.  Is Genshin Impact the new hotness? Are you playing it, or will you check it out? Leave an impact in the comments below!